CAR SALESMAN GOES BERSERK AT BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION AFTER SHOUTING "HIP HIP" AND GETTING NO "HOORAY" IN RETURN

A 34-year-old car salesman was arrested last night after what began as a happy event–a birthday party for a colleague– turned violent.  According to an unnamed customer who was at the dealership to have his sparkplugs rotated, about 20 employees of Megalopolitan Ford-Kia-Husqvarna were celebrating service advisor Pengus Woochit’s 30th birthday.  

Police arrest salesman Wick Dooley
following dealership birthday party fracas

“They sang ‘Happy Birthday'," said the customer," and then one salesman shouted, ‘Hip Hip!’ but no one said ‘Hooray’ and he just went nuts.”

Police said the salesman, later identified as 34-year-old Wick Dooley, grabbed a cardboard
Se Habla Espanol sign and struck several colleagues with it and also set fire to a stack of odometer mileage disclosure forms.

Police arrived and arrested Dooley, who reportedly was despondent over his failure to meet his monthly corrosion protection sales quota.  “It was scary,” said the anonymous customer. “From now on, I'll be the first to yell 'Hooray'!”